What are you Standards?

I want to first share a quote with you from one of my mentors , Tony Robbins:

‎"Any time you sincerely want to make a change, the first thing you must do is to raise your standards."

I have looked high and low and everywhere in between and the one thing I can’t find is what happened to the standards we use to keep for ourselves.

This country used to pride itself on the fact that we were going to do it better than everyone else. Now, the mentality is more like, I will just do enough to make it work, I will just study enough to pass, I will just work hard enough to win by 1. Then, we complain when things don’t go our way or we feel like we got a bum deal.

How long are we going to keep on blaming outside sources for challenges in our lives? We blame the guy at work for working harder than us. We blame the elements for not getting to work on time, we blame god for the bad breaks, when, in fact, in every single occasion, the one common denominator is us!

You want more? You better be willing to do more. You want to open a business? You better be willing to do whatever is necessary to make it work. You want to be a wonderful parent? You better be ready to do what is hard just as much as what is easy to do.

For all of you out there that at times feel like you want more, want to be more and what to do more, the only thing stopping you is your standards.

Setting the bar low allows you to not expect too much, and then, you won’t get hurt, or better yet, won’t gets your hopes up too high. The only difference between average and great is the standards that we set for ourselves.

If you are a parent, I will ask you this one question: Do you want your kids to be average or great? I don’t believe one of you would ever say average. Then, stop acting that way and raise your standards to the moon.

Now I am not saying you have to play in the Major Leagues or be CEO of a Fortune 500 company -- you don’t. But you do need to be the best anything that you are right now. If you own a small business, take it to the next level. If you are a secretary, what can you do to be the best?

Set the example and the rest will take care of itself. Take a look at some of the challenges you have ever faced and conquered. I promise you, when you look back and examine what made it possible, you will find one thing and one thing only: Every single time you raised your standards to overcome the challenge.

For me, since I was 16, I wanted to run the famous Utica Boilermaker and my standard was, I can’t do that. Well, 20 years later, at the age of 36, I had finally raised my standards to conquer my challenge.

I am proud to say, three years later I am still raising my standards ,as I finished 2 and half minutes faster than the year before.

What will be your challenge that you raise your standards to conquer?

Remember be positive, be real, and live your life In The Zone.

"Coaching In The Zone" Presents our MEGA 1YR ANNIVERSARY SHOW

WOW CAN YOU BELIEVE IT HAS BEEN A YEAR ALREADY? Yes "Coaching In The Zone is turning 1 yr old, and do we have a show for you. Listen in this Sunday July 11th as we welcome back some of our most amazing guests through out the past year. You won't want to miss this. Tons of fun lots of laughs, and of course some of the most amazing individuals sharing insightful ways to empower you to live the life of your dreams. So join us this Sunday July 11th at 9:00pm EST for this 2 hour MEGA Anniversary show. If you would like to listen on your phone please call 347-857-1733 or to listen live online go to:http://www.blogtalkradio.com/coaching-in-the-zone/2010/07/12/coaching-in-the-zone

This time of the year is the height of high school graduations. In that spirit, I would like to take this time to write to all those young adults and future leaders of tomorrow. The topic I choose today is one that is simple, yet, often times, missed as we go through life. "Don’t wait" is not just a statement, it is a motto to live by. I encourage all off you to go out and volunteer in your community. Go to an elderly home and ask the question: “If you could share any piece of advice with me what would it be?”

The answer will be the same across the board, DON’T WAIT!

•Don’t wait to see a sun set.

•Don’t wait to tell your Mom or Dad you love them.

•Don’t wait to go after your dreams.

•Don’t wait to travel.

•Don’t wait to help a complete stranger.

•Don’t wait to call your Sister or Brother.

•Don’t wait to have lunch with an old friend.

•Don’t wait to travel through Europe.

•Don’t wait to find the perfect job.

•Don’t wait to start your own Business.

•Don’t wait to say I’m sorry.

•Don’t wait to tell someone you love them.

•Don’t wait to start exercising.

•Don’t wait to have kids.

•Don’t wait to live life fully.

•Don’t wait to…………………….

I think you're starting to get the idea. So if you wait to do any one of these things, the sad truth is, you never will at all.

I will share one of the greatest pieces of advice I can give you at this point in time in your life: If you wait till the time is right, if you wait till you have enough money, one day, 70 years from now, someone might ask you the question: If you could share any piece of advice with me what would it be?

You will say in a shallow voice ……DON’T WAIT.

Remember be positive, be real, and live your life In The Zone.

 

 

 

 

Lately, there has been quite a bit of tragedy in our area.

• A man was shot by a disgruntled customer.
• Two high-school kids were saverely injured in a car crash, one ultimately died.

Many times, we find ourselves searching for the answers to why these things happen or what we should do now.

 

When faced with hard and difficult times, more often than not, our first reaction is to shut down.

 

We then pull ourselves up and figure out a way to move on. As we struggle to get back to our daily routine depending on the individual or events that occurred, it may take weeks, or even months before we find any strength to move forward just a little.

 

Now, I am not claiming to be a psychiatrist or anything like that, but I have not only gone through my own challenges, but I have meet and interviewed many people on this subject as well.

 

The reason it's so hard to move forward is the questions that we ask ourselves.

 

Now, it’s understandable, at first, to think and ask good questions. The goal is not to keep asking the same questions over and over again. For example, let’s say you lost your job. Some might ask Why did this happen to me? or What am I going to do now? Those are common and often the first things that come to mind.

 

In order to get better answers in life, you need to ask better questions:

 

• What did I learn from this experience?
• What job would I love to go after now that I have this opportunity?

You see, what's most important is the need to develop the skill to focus on the solution, not the problem.

 

I'm sure a lot of people will say this is easier said than done. Yes, but you need to understand that this is a skill, not something you are born with.

 

With any skill, it can be learned over time. I am a father to two amazing children (Andrew 7, Allison 3). They are my world and I would never want to think about something happening to them. So I can’t speak from the perspective of losing a child, but I can give you an example of someone who did and what happened.

 

I am not sure if you are aware, but there are their five stages of grief:

•  Denial: “This can’t be happening to me.”
• Anger: “Why is this happening? Who is to blame?”
• Bargaining: “Make this not happen, and in return I will ____.”
• Depression: “I’m too sad to do anything.”
• Acceptance: “I’m at peace with what happened.”

 

I believe there is a sixth stage and that is: Action or Activism. For some, when they get to this stage, they are committed to making sure that whatever event happened to them does not happen to anyone else ever again. The one person that comes to mind for me is Jack Walsh.

 

Jack’s son Adam was abducted at the age of 7, and 16 days later, he was found murdered. For the Walsh family, once they got through the five stages, they quickly went to work on stage six, and took massive and immediate action to make a change.

 

The Walsh family soon began a campaign to help missing and exploited children. Despite bureaucratic and legislative problems, John and Revé's efforts eventually led to the creation of the Missing Children Act of 1982 and the Missing Children's Assistance Act of 1984.

 

Following the crime, the Walsh family founded the Adam Walsh Child Resource Center, a non-profit organization dedicated to legislative reform. The centers originally located in West Palm Beach, Florida; Columbia, South Carolina; Orange County, California; and Rochester, New York; merged with the National Center for Missing and Exploited Children (NCMEC), where John Walsh serves on the Board of Directors.

 

Today, Walsh continues to testify before Congress and state legislatures on crime, missing children and victims' rights issues. His latest efforts include lobbying for a Constitutional amendment for victims' rights.

 

The Adam Walsh Child Protection and Safety Act (Pub.L. 109-248) was signed into law by U.S. President George W. Bush on July 27, 2006 following a two-year journey through the United States Congress and was intensely lobbied for by Walsh and the National Center for Missing and Exploited Children. Primarily, it focuses on a national sex offender registry, tough penalties for not registering as a sex offender following release into society, and access by citizens to state websites that track sex offenders.

 

Most importantly, the Walsh’s did something else that showed us all that this act of a mad man would not hold them hostage for the rest of their lives. After the murder of Adam, the Walsh’s had three more children: Meghan, Callahan, and Hayden. Meghan was born a year after Adam was murdered, Callahan was born in 1985, and Hayden (born 1995) is the youngest child. Revé Walsh told local newspapers at the time that "there is no substitute for Adam." A side note to this as well, John Walsh did not stop there either.

 

 Walsh has also been the host of the FOX television show "America's Most Wanted" since 1988. He was selected as host after the completion of the program's pilot and a lengthy search. By that time, Walsh was already well-known because of the murder of his son and his subsequent actions to help missing and exploited children. Walsh continues to host the show, which is now the longest-running show of any kind in FOX history and has contributed to the capture of more than 1,000 fugitives.

 

What kind of questions do you think the Walsh’s asked? Ones that moved them to action or ones that kept them imprisoned in the tragedy?

 

Ask better questions and you will get betters answers.

 

Remember be positive, be real and live your life In The Zone.

 

To post a comment click the link provided. Comment

 

 

 

Sean Stephenson Live on Coaching In The Zone

Manny Goldman On Coaching In The Zone

How do you know if you are on the right path?

I have asked myself that question time and time again. And,truth be told, I'm not really sure if I have the correct answer.

Often times when we go after certain things in life, we may have enormous success right away. This drives us to not only keep going, but to also try new and different things along the way. But, somewhere along the way, things change.

Things can get harder or they get increasingly more and more challenging. The first thought is, I can’t do this anymore or I just can’t catch a break. When this happens, we try to convince ourselves that not only are we right, but that we need to find the solution immediately.

When this happens, more times than not, we quit because it is just too hard. Then, everyone around you will tell you the same thing over and over again: I am sorry things didn’t work out, but I knew it.

HOW IN THE HELL DID THEY KNOW?

They had no idea, because they gave up quicker than you did and now they will be supportive after you fail. I am not here today to preach to you that I have all the answers, because I don’t. No one does. But I can tell you this with 100 percent honesty: I know I am on the right path because my heart tells me I am.

How I feel when I have a conversation with someone who wants to find out more about what I do is an electric and empowering feeling that leaves me believing that I can do anything.

The right path is not something you find and it is not a skill you can learn. No, the question was, How do you know if you are on the right path? Easy, your heart will tell you.

If it feels right to you and only you, then you are on the right path. The most important thing is getting there.

Remember be positive, be real and live your life In The Zone.